The illusion of pardon

     Dear Fran,

     I was looking forward to getting home to tell you what happened to me this morning in Carmona. But first I want to ask you if you have heard of 'the illusion of pardon'. A feeling by which the person sentenced to death waits until the last moment to be left alive.

     That happened to me for the first time fifty years ago... and this morning I felt it again. I tell you.

     I presented a painting (of which I do not have any photos to show you) to one of the Andalusian painting competitions and I dare say about Spain: the 'José Arpa'. After a while and seeing that they had already given the award to an excellent artist such as Ángel Alén and that I had not received any notification about my work, I assumed that they had not selected me. So, this morning I went to the palace where I delivered my Trabajos en la Ronda de la Alcazaba and when a very kind young woman came back from the warehouse she told me that the piece was not found there, that it was undoubtedly selected and she was surprised that I was to remove it. I explained to her what I have explained to you and she apologized while asking me where I came from; that if I came from far away. I reassured her by telling her that going to Carmona is always a pleasure for me and that I would take advantage of the rest of the morning walking through its streets.

     Fran, surely you wonder why I have told you about this illusion that the unfortunate people, who are going to die, have. Because three days ago I heard about that feeling and because when I came down the road to remove the paint I kept saying to myself: and if it is among the chosen ones and I have not received any information by mistake? 

     Y. a.

     Mary

 Man´s Search for Meaning (2)

The illusion of pardon  

It´s a feeling of consolation that those condemned to death develop before their execution. Wretched who conceive the hope that they will be pardoned at the last moment.

 Man´s Search for Meaning 

For Harry or Marion who haven't been born yet 

 

<< He could have developed logotherapy in America, thus fulfilling his life's mission, but he did not. He thus he arrived at Auschwitz. >>

 

 

     Beijar a terra  

 

Beijei a terra com os meus olhos, a minha

boca e os meus dedos

Enrolei-a a mim em círculos inumeráveis

E em contemplações intermináveis

Dissolvi-me nos seus segredos.

 

Sophia de Mello Breyner

 

      Works closed, not finished

     Dear Fran,

in your last email you asked me about the paintings that may, one day, be exhibited in Guillena.

 

Guillena´s postal cards

     Dear Fran,

     I have started to paint a series of pictures of a town called Guillena and its two small villages: Las Pajanosas and Torre de la Reina.

 

14746, 14747

     Dear Fran,

     This poignant story had me gripped with its sadness, both the murderers and Capote himself.

     The film, 2005, is directed by Bennett Miller and played by Philip Seymour Hoffman as the New Orleans writer, with Catherine Keener as the writer Harper Lee.

     Given the admiration, I would say fervour, that I feel for this man, when his name appeared on the television screen on a black background, I stayed glued to the armchair in my living room and didn´t blink for the next 114 minutes.

     Nothing to do with Breakfast at Tiffany´s, this film is a lancinating recreation of the life of the murderers, especially Perry Smith, and of the man who approached them.

     Fran, I really liked the photography, the music, the scenery, the costumes and the rate used by the film director in order to transport us to the early sixties of the last century.

     The actors have been immense in their roles and — if I have to refute something — it´s the treatment that in some moments they have given the protagonist´s height. There are shots where he appears much shorter than his friend Harper (apparently he was shorter than her) and others where he seems to have grown up; let´s not say when he´s next to Perry. All this will seem silly to you, but you know I keep 94 per cent of the details I see!

     To sum it, I will tell you that the title of de book seems to me the most accurate, because no one has the right to kill in cold blood: not Dick, not Perry, not the legal Kansas citizens.

     Y. a.

     Mary